The Ruins of Gymes Castle and other Slovakian adventures

I first visited Slovakia exactly four years ago in 2009 and remember being utterly confused and overwhelmed by the Bratislava bus station. My first bus ride at that time took me past a ruined castle on a hilltop that I dreamed of  visiting one day. Thus it was with considerable satisfaction that I finally did so. I navigated the buses with ease and skill this time, eventually arriving at the village of Jelenec (with no help from the miserable hags at the Nitra bus station) (Jelenec is prounced 'Yel-en-ets'). With my 15kgs of luggage I walked into the countryside past decaying communist structures until I found a path up the hill. The signs were confusing, but a steady trail of oak leaves kept me on track.

The windswept Gymes Castle far excelled my expectations, becoming the most enchanting and exciting ruins I've ever seen. I ran around in a flight of euphoria, climbing every tower, entering every tunnel and following every twisted path that led through and around.

There is never enough time to linger long and I enjoyed another cross-country run down the hill and into the town to catch my bus.

The next day I took a short train and bus to Cachtice (pron. Chuck-teet-sa), where an hour's walk took me up to the castle (below) made infamous by Elizabeth Bathory the Blood Countess.

Faced with an 80 minute wait for the next bus, I did what any sane person would do and ran 5kms along the train tracks.

Navigating the public transport with Germanic efficiency, I reached the next ruins of Castle Beckov (pron. Bet-skow... above).

Early on my third day I travelled north to Povazsky Bystrica and walked out and up to the ruins of the castle there (above and below).  Definitely worth the heavy-laden hike.  My hips are on the verge of betraying me.

I then headed into Zilina and found that I'd lost my credit card again.  I rushed back to the train station and found it in the possession of an old man selling cheap candy on a card table.  He wanted a gesture of gratitude so I happily handed over 20 euros, knowing how much more it would mean to him and how much less it cost than losing my card.

A little later than planned, I continued my mission out to Lietava Castle (above and below).

On the fourth day, I walked past the ruins of Strecno Castle (below).  After reading that entry was only permitted with a tour guide I decided that this would not work for me in the slightest.  

Further down the river, the forested ruins of Stary Hrad (below) awaited, and they were truly delightful. I climbed a wall to get into the tower that called out to me and blissed out.

I have seen some of the most stunningly pretty people in Slovakia. Some women looked like Disney princesses come to life and I've seen the occasional guy who could easily be my Prince Eric. The best things in life are free and that includes dreams.

On my fifth day, after a night in the mountain city of Poprad, I visited my 8th and final ruined castle of Slovakia: Spissky Hrad (above and below).

I concluded my physically strenuous tour of ruined castles in Slovakia with a day at the north Hungarian city of Miskolc. They have cave baths. And just when you think you've been through all the twisting tunnels you find another pool system with hotter water, darker lighting and a Solarium with illuminated stars and an eerie soundtrack of whispers, laughing, chanting or moaning and the occasional cry. It was very 'Chamber of Secrets' meets 'Night on Bald Mountain'.

(Not my photo, because mine didn't begin to capture it).  

The Czech chapter

In 2011 I stayed with my friend Slaven on the north coast of Poland, but this time we caught up in the city where we met, Prague.

Our first expedition into the countryside led us to Valdstejn Castle. We arrived as a wedding party left, and found to our delight the occasional flute of champagne left untouched around the castle. Wastage being a sin, we were morally obliged to put a swift end to them. It was like an Easter Egg Hunt, only infinitely better.

After a long hike lush forests and rocky crags, we arrived late to the ruins of Castle Trosky (above).  Slaven warned me it might be impossible to get inside, but I assured him that I did not understand the meaning of this sentence.

The gates were firmly locked and monitored by cameras, so I was forced to scale a 5m stone wall to gain entry.  The things people make me do...

Our second adventure took us to the magical town of Cesky Krumlov.  I have never seen a more fairy-tale setting and if there was one place I wish everyone could see, this is it.

It was unfortunately congested with tourists, and it's not that I hate all other tourists, for the hypocrisy of that statement would be too much for even me to shoulder, but I hate most other tourists: lumbering, loud, blocking the road with sluggish tour groups and milling around like a languid fart... my kingdom for a cattle-prod.

 I stayed overnight by myself and enjoyed the town much more when the streets were dark and deserted.

On the way back to Prague the next morning, I stopped in Trisov for a hike to the ruined castle of Divci Kamen (above and below). Not the brooding skies, not the stubborn rain and not even the insane, uphill run that got me back to the train on time could dampen my enjoyment.

Inside these ruins was a space designed for gatherings with a stage and benches arranged amongst the stones.

United States of... Estonia

After three days in New York I flew onward to Europe and then Tartu, Estonia.

The next day as I explored the lakeside woods near Võru, every young oak sapling I found became a marker on my path, leading me to the deer I startled and the crow who flapped into the canopy, crying, "There's a man in the forest!"

I spent the following afternoon on a tiny jetty that reached out over the surface of the lake, where waterskimmers darted between the lilypads, bejewelled dragonflies soared from the reeds to investigate my presence and the occasional flash of silver light came from below when the sun caught the side of a fish.

Eventually I made my way back to the capital city for a few hours frolicking around the old town of Tallinn, where I took great delight in a reunion with one of my favourite trees in the world (below right).